« market research | Main | hair »
October 17, 2004
fellowship of the table
Last night ten of us sat around the table savoring wine, salad, plum chicken, couscous, green beans, and the first pumpkin pie of the fall. Friends from Chattanooga had joined us for the weekend and the night was filled with laughter and dialogue. Earlier that day, we spent hours at the kitchen table doing the same thing; laughing so hard my stomach hurt.
Each of these situations was accompanied by food and drink, from Utah honey to French wine. The table, whether it be in the kitchen or the dining room, has the ability to foster laughter and discussion like no other place in the house.
It saddens me that in American culture this sight is rare.
An article I read today discusses how Americans relate to their food. The writer articulates the differences in the relationship that the French have with food, compared to Americans. He states:
The French eat all sorts of ''unhealthy'' foods, but they do it according to a strict and stable set of rules: they eat small portions and don't go back for seconds; they don't snack; they seldom eat alone, and communal meals are long, leisurely affairs. A well-developed culture of eating, such as you find in France or Italy, mediates the eater's relationship to food, moderating consumption even as it prolongs and deepens the pleasure of eating.
Americans need an improved culture of eating that will "mediate the eater's relationship to food." It is no secret that we are a culture of over consumption. In the midst of all this consumption, the pleasure of what it means to prepare and partake in a meal has been lost. The portions are too big, the time too short, and the community around the table, non-existent. Rather than seeing food as something to enjoy through the eating of the meal and being a member of the community it affords, it has been distorted into one of unmitigated consumption, where eating the "wrong" food brings guilt and instead of promoting community, food is sought to fill the gap of empty relationships.
Bonhoeffer says:
Through our daily meals He is calling us to rejoice, to keep holiday in the midst of our working day... The fellowship of the table teaches Christians that here they still eat the perishable bread of the earthly pilgrimage. But if they share this bread with one another, they shall also one day receive the imperishable bread together in the Father's house.
It seems poignant to me that on the night before His crucifixion, Christ took part in a meal with His disciples. The church partakes in this fellowship with a bit of bread and drink during communion. Our communion should not rest with just this bite; our own tables should be extended with food and drink in another opportunity to love one another.
Posted by Charity at October 17, 2004 07:35 PM
Hmm...The French may not snack constantly like Americans do, but they still snack. Proof? They have a meal call "quatre-heures" (or "four-o'clock") where you have tea with bread, butter, Nutella, jam, etc.
However, I miss food being a big deal. Even Thanksgiving dinner can turn into a thirty-minute meal. Someone wakes up at the crack of dawn to cook a turkey and you scarf down the food.
Fortunately, my immediate family is comprised of a bunch of talkers so they tend to linger.
Posted by jamie at October 18, 2004 09:26 AM
Good thoughts, Charity. As anyone who knows me can attest, I have the worst eating habits (i.e. I hardly ever eat, and when I do, it's usually crap) so the night was truly an interesting and enjoyable time for me.
Interesting how something so mundane as eating a meal with a couple other people can, potentially, hold great (and even sacred) significance in hindsight.
Posted by Jason at October 18, 2004 12:57 PM
true, true... i love your description of what the table fosters, and the connection to The Table of our Lord Jesus. When i think of The Grand house, tables are often a part of my memories and favorite times - eating, playing pitch, talking and talking, stretching them out to fit a lot of people. Well done, ladies. i think you've embodied fostering fellowship at the table. i look forward to sharing such with you again!
Posted by kate at October 18, 2004 05:20 PM
What about second breakfast!?
Yes! Charity you are SO right on!!
Posted by Jeannette at October 19, 2004 12:13 AM
Thanks for this poignant and though-provoking entry, Charity. I know you weren't at the action night Bible study last week, but did you read the essay for the week, "What are Things For?" The word "consumption" is the key work throughout the entire essay, and there are so many parallels between your entry and this essay. i would highly recommend it, you would enjoy it.
There's a lot of info in your short entry about one of the fundamentals for weight loss: eating small portions, not going back for seconds, and savoring the fellowship of the meal, not so much the food. Say goodbye to Jenny Craig and Atkins and get back to the basics, America!
Posted by Sarah B. at October 19, 2004 01:29 PM
Man- I miss you all.
Posted by Lou at October 21, 2004 01:15 PM
You said it, Charity. The Brits seem to have the same appreciation for long meals--they do the whole several course thing. The other evening we were served a meal that started with the main course (a roast--the English ALWAYS have roast), then we had dessert, then we had cheese and then we had coffee. It was terrific. The food definitely wasn't as good as the French would have done, but the idea was there, and I realized it's much more the idea than the food. But it seems as if you can't really linger over a meal that doesn't taste as good... I'm thinking all you reall need is the wine and everything else will fall into place.
Reader Comments